Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Please, your opinion ONLY matters if it's what I want to hear!

First of all...all of you that have blogs where we can't see your WRITING...over 70% of us hate that the most...so make the writing so we can READ it! Thanks very much...

Second I have a bunch of cool homemade videos that I have done to announce the winners of my "Thanks a Bunch" give away. But I am leaving for a trip first thing tomorrow morning...and that means you will have to wait to SEE who won until Saturday evening...Sunday morning latest! Sorry...it's just the way it is.

Third...Mands if you are reading this...stop now...I am pre-warning you...this WARNING goes out to all pregnant women right now...stop reading.

Okay, are they gone?


I was talking with my Prego sister-in-law the other day about...well...prego things. And I got to thinking about when I first became pregnant with DCar.

I was so giddy and excited to share the news with anyone that wanted to listen! It didn't take long for us to get pregnant...in fact, I am glad I wasn't permiscuous when I was younger because apparently I'm fertile Mertile! I think about it and I get pregnant...it's David Blaine kinda stuff...

Anyway, you know what bugs me beyond bugging me?

You don't?

Good, cause I was going to tell you anyway.

I HATE it when you announce something as exciting and cool as being pregnant for the first time to someone and the first thing that pops out of the person's mouth is HOW HORRENDOUS and AWFUL and PAINFUL it is!

Example: Me telling someone I'm pregnant, "Hey nice to meet you stranger standing in line in front of me with more than 20 items in the 20 items or less Walmart line...I got knocked up! Isn't it awesome?!!!"

Person who is standing in front of me in line with more than 20 items in the 20 items or less line replies back, "Oh that's cool...but I don't envy you. The morning sickness...the incredible pain in your back and stomach throughout the pregnancy...and THEN comes Labor...talk about a undescribable pain...they say you forget, but I'll never forget...I would rather stab myself in the stomach repeatedly then go through pregnancy and labor and delivery...think about the most PAINFUL bowel movement you have ever had...now times that by 100 or 1000 even! Do you get it...it's PAINFUL. But you know...I'm excited for you."

Okay so maybe not THAT dramatic...but for some reason, and it may only happen to me, when I announce something of pure joy and elation...I always get the WHOA is ME response.

Seriously, that is all I can remember from the first few months of pregnancy...well, that and not getting sick, which would lead me also to remember the blonde girls name that worked the window of Wendy's after midnight..."Stephanie, yes I would like my usual Jr. Cheeseburger Deluxe."
So let me just say...when someone tells you they are pregnant. DON'T tell them of your worst labor and delivery story...like your epidural didn't kick in and you had your baby natural and you'd rather die than go through that pain again...or that you were planning to have your baby natural and your babies heart dipped dangerously low and you were rushed in for a Cesearen section and vomited the whole time from the spinal tap they gave you...and heaven forbid...please don't tell me about a still birth...I had nightmares EVERYNIGHT always laying on my left side and jumping up screaming to get to the hospital because my baby hadn't moved in the last 30 seconds...it was like walking on egg shells!

When they tell you they are pregnant. Reach deep down inside yourself and be happy for them...show them that happiness...genuinely congratulate them...

if you can't...if you find yourself twitching to tell them a HORRIBLE AND SCARY pregnant or birthing story...then back slowly away, claim sudden diarrhea or illness of some sort.

Please, for the LOVE of all that is holy, think about the other person...overwhelm them with things they want to hear like...oh, it's nothing...piece of cake...I could have 20 more no problem...you will love every second of it...ya know, fib, lie, do what you must.

This post is NOT announcing that I am pregnant.


Mamarazzi said...

good tips...i don't understand people like that. how does one person's good news turn into another soap box of how it could all go horribly wrong?

on this topic...as a woman with no bioligical children of my own i need to RANT that IF you have been blessed with children, quit complaining about them. and while we are at it...shut up about how horrible morning sickness is and how you can't eat the things you love anymore or sleep in the position you love to sleep in or how the baby wakes you at all hours of the night...

TRUST me when i tell you there are plenty of women out there (including myself) who would trade places with you in a second.

yep, i wanna eat something and have my baby decide they don't want it leaving me hanging over the toilet. sure gimme a sleepless night because of a crying baby...i'll take it.

because you know what? ALL of that means one thing...that i am either pregnant with a child of my own OR i have just given birth to a child of my own, and that would pretty much be the most awesome and amazing thing EVER!

ok rant over....you just got me thinking a few thinks.

sorry to purge on your blog, but i do feel better!

Candid Carrie said...

I agree with you B-Thoughts, totally.

And I don't care if that Ms. Teen Thing is eight months along and smokin' an unfiltered cig, just get out of her way and keep your mouth shut and if that means picking up her empty beer cans and picking them up for recycling you just do it.

Preach to her about the greening up the planet if you feel the need to preach. Then offer to buy that baby once she squirts it out. There is a good chance she already knows about the pain and the secondary market on kids is an amazing way to get rich quick.

Kritta22 said...

I totally agree! Why do people have to burst another's bubble. It's like the ultimate rudeness!! Find something good about it..it's not that hard people!
I really enjoy your posts!

Kass Martin said...

I totally agree! People need to keep that kind of info to themselves. As I was reading that I was kind of, sadly, reminded of myself because I get diarrhea of the mouth when I can't think of something to say so I would end up spilling all sorts of unwanted information to poor pregnant girls. I love the picture of the husband and wife. My husband gains more than I do when I am pregnant. It's funny. He's so happy with me finally giving into all sorts of bad things without guilt so he gives in too. Oh well! It's fun to go and splurge when you have the craving. With as busy as Bridget is, it's going to be a while before I am taking the pregnancy road again. but it'll happen soon enough I am sure. I too am fertile mertle. My doctor told me when I got pregnant with Dayne that it's a blessing and a curse b/c I could end up with 10 kids when I only wanted 5. I'm crossing my fingers my birth control is strong!!!

Kass Martin said...

I can't believe you type 135 words a minute. That is so impressive. I am nowhere near that and I was proud of my number. I'm feeling like I should brush up and take the test again :)

Anonymous said...

A.M.E.N. SISTA!!!!!

Anonymous said...

You know what I found? Women over 50 were the worst. I don't want to hear how bad things were back in the dark ages and hold the details and sympathetic belly pat -- keep your dirty mitts to yourself, lady!

It's all a vicious circle though, don't you find that? You don't want to hear all the advice because quite frankly, it's subjective. But one of the first things out your mouth in the third trimester is, "there's a silent society of pregnant women who don't tell other never-been-pregnant women about pregnancy and how difficult it can be..."

I can relate to both sides, pregnancy and Mamarazzi. In fact, I wrote a lengthy post on it last week and talked about things I still haven't uttered out loud 6 years later.

And incidentally, last Thursday I posted 13 tips on travelling long haul with children (if you are all going...). When I was searching for advice back in January/February, there was limited resources out there offering help or advice.

There are a ton of things to see and do in London, in fact, a long time ago I spent 4 days there and still didn't get to see everything I wanted to. I'd recommend a bus tour if you are going with a tour group. You can get off at any stop you want and get back on with the same ticket. I'm excited for you, you'll have a blast. If you like curry, ask the hotel to recommend somewhere, Britain makes the best curry, second only to India itself.

I should have e-mailed, shouldn't I?

Erica said...

You know what is so funny about this post is that I always feel like this when I'm pregnant. Wherever I am people always feel that it is their job to talk to me about their terrible birthing story. For the love, I don't want to hear that crap. Do they want sympathy, or just to make me more nervous to bring a child into this world. Anyhow, I also feel like when I'm pregnant just wearing a sign around my neck that say "yes, i'm excited that I'm pregnant, this is my due date, yes i'm having a boy AGAIN, and yes I'm scared to give birth". or maybe just have a pre-recorded message in my purse. Whatever! I feel you! love the post

Mamarazzi said...

Shelle...i had to delete your comment on my blog. i have NOT adopted J she is Paul's daughter and there is a babymama who i think may sometimes lurk and i don't want to cause issues. you can email me for more details.

whenever i refer to "other adults" in J's life i am talking about babymama...lol.

ANYWAY we hear that she looks a lot like me all the time AND i often forget that she is not my biological child...but i NEVER forget that were are most def a match made in heaven...she was born to be my daughter and i was born to be here mom...perfectly matched!! she NEEDED me and i NEEDED her. and she is mine mine mine ALL mine!

Amanda said...

You are SO pregnant. Just kidding.

I loved being pregnant. I wish I could do it a few more times, but it has to end sometime.

That was for your pregnant readers.

Kandace said...

I totally thought you were going to say you were pregnant. AND, I agree thank heavens I wasn't permiscuous. Fertile Mertile in the house!

Anonymous said...

i dont want to be pregnant ever.

you got an award on my blog.

Natalie Sue said...

Oh I agree. The first thing a person says in response to your announcing you are pregnant should not be an awful birthing story! Labor and delivery is always different each time around.. there's no way you can prepare for it as a new mom. After hearing everyone's horror stories, I just had to keep telling myself.. well, ya don't hear of anyone dying anymore...plus we have medicine and doctors and everything will be just fine in the end, no matter how hard it is! (Thank GOODNESS CAUSE IT IS HARD! :) ) But well worth it.

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