Tuesday, July 15, 2008

All I am asking for is a Courtesy Flush...

The title says it all...but I am all about the deep issues here at BlokThoughts and something has come up with my husband and I that I hope you guys can help me us with.

We are having a bit of trouble agreeing on many one particular issue...

I know, I know...total SHOCKER...if I don't have the most perfect marriage, I don't know who does...nonetheless...I am here to solve the MOST IMPORTANT issue of issues.

I was at work...if anyone knows me in the REAL world...you know that I HATE to waste time going to the bathroom. It is seriously the most boring of boring things to do...and I curse my bladder EVERYTIME I feel the urge to pee...ESPECIALLY if it is NOT at my house in the comfort of my own home...

But I was at work...I felt the urge, and my bladder had held on as long as it could


So I rush out of my cubie and make it to the bathroom just in time. I see that there is NO one else in the stalls and I was relieved to see that my FAVORITE stall (the handicap) was open and available for my use. Hey...don't play hate...it has more room for me to...uuuhhh...do my business.

I'm sitting there twiddling my thumbs...and for some reason my pee had stage fright or something because it didn't automatically come out...so I'm sitting there WAITING...when someone else comes in the bathroom. (For some reason...my body always tenses UP when someone else comes in a bathroom that was previously empty of all patrons besides myself)...I thought to myself, "Crap...now I am for sure going to have stage fright"...this is why I HATE public restrooms...because even though I am not SHY in nature...My body is shy when emptying bodily fluids...plus the fact I hate to take the time to do it!!!

Just so everyone knows for FUTURE reference...there is a EVERY-OTHER-STALL standard that must be practiced when entering a nearly empty and quiet bathroom. When there is only ONE other person besides yourself...please, PLEASE, don't go in the stall RIGHT next to them...ESPECIALLY if you have to go number TWO (which equals poo for all of you that are not from this planet and don't KNOW that!)

That is what my fellow co-worker did. The lady sits in the stall RIGHT NEXT TO MINE and proceeds to have a BLOW OUT. I'm surprised she made the toilet and I WOULDN'T be surprised is she had to clean up after. She grunts and she groans and then I hear the droppings hit the water...

Seriously 5 minutes go by and the lady is STILL emptying whatever she had for dinner the night before and apparently for breakfast...

And the WHOLE time I am thinking..."Where the HECK is her courtesy FLUSH". See there is a rule that must be followed along with the EVERY OTHER STALL rule. That is the rule where if you are going number TWO...and you begin to POO...please don't BLUSH...just FLUSH.

Seriously...I don't want to smell your STANK...so flush it away before too much of the smell drifts up and over or under the stall doors to hit my nose.

This happens to me quite often because I usually have to wait until the person is done before my body relaxes and is allowed to finish emptying its contents...and I am ALWAYS floored how many people don't know of the Courtesy Flush rule. It's crazy to me!

This is where my husband argues my point. He said, "If you go into a public restroom, then you shouldn't be surprised when people are using the bathroom and stink it up...that is what it is for...to GO TO THE BATHROOM. They don't have to care about how it smells or if someone else is in the other stall...they get in, do their business, and get out. It's not rude if you don't flush. I don't"

Those poor people that have had to experience my husband's STANK in a public restroom...I feel for you...if I knew who you were I'd pay for your therapy...NO one should have to live through that.



What do you think?


Shannon said...

I think that is about the funniest thing I have ever read! You crack me up! I totally agree with you on going to the bathroom. It's annoying! I put it off whenever possible and hate going in public!!

By the way I posted a pic on my blog just for you. It looked much worse the next day.

Dopp Family said...

haha... That is so true!! Who goes into the stall right next to you if the rest of the stalls are empty?! Hopefully that lady was just having a really bad day (sounds like it wasn't the best)!

Very insightful information, nonetheless. I rarely, if ever, have read proper etiquette on Public Bathrooms. Good to finally hear some input!

PS - it was super fun to have lunch with you last week! let' not wait so long next time!

Wendi said...

Oh my gosh...can't stop laughing. You are so darned hilarious!! Found you on Mamma Belle's blog. :)
I'll surely be back!

Amanda said...

Why would you not WANT to courtesy flush? Isn't it a bit embarrassing? I can see guys not caring, but we don't go into their bathrooms, so who cares.

That sign is hilarious. Where did you see that? I want one.

Megan said...

I think if someone has to go that badly they're not thinking about courtesy. She was just praying that she didn't mess herself at work. The fact it was in the toilet was a victory for her.

We have 5 people and 1 potty. We're lucky if the person jumping up and down in the hallway can wait outside the door before the current potty user flushes.

It was a public bathroom, I kinda side with your DH on this one. Don't hate. :)

J'Ollie Primitives said...

courtesy flush. please.

Marie + Jeff said...

So I am totally a courtesy flusher. I usually flush mid-poo just so that the stank don't get out.

You know, there was a hella funny email that I got awhile back about bathroom etiquette at work. I wish that I still had it so that you could post it. It was so funny...and unfortunately so true!

John Deere Mom said...

Hey! I just found you through Candid Carrie and am so glad I did! You are hilarious!
Anyway, I've never given much thought to the bathroom etiquette. I never make a "serious" transaction in public and if the mood strikes at work...it's a one seater locked bathroom. I haven't found a public bathroom that doesn't smell like um, business, so I just expect it now when I have to schlep the kids in EVERY.TIME. we go somewhere.

brooke&dus said...

I'm like you I HATE using public bathrooms! I would rather hold it and make my stomach hurt than use a public bathroom!

Jenni said...

Seems like the only time I ever use a public bathroom is when my kids are with me. Then, they pretty much force the courtesy flush, what with the "Oooh, mommy, that lady's poop stinks" and such comments.

Helpful little fellas sometimes.

DeGraffenried's said...

You are too funny! I can't believe you are even talking about this subject!! I believe in the every other stall and I also side with your other half - it's public - you get what you get in there!

The Bayou Belles and Their Beau said...

We are of like mind.

I, too, do not like to waste my time going to the bathroom. I don't have the time for it.

I also get stage fright.

I agree about the courtesy flush. Maybe there should be signs informing ladies about the courtesy flush.

Kandace said...

Freaking crying.

That is all.

Oh! and give me a freaking courtesy flush!

Anonymous said...

I don't mind peeing in public, but I absolutely RESENT the #2 urge and avoid it at all costs. I would much rather leave that to the confounds of my own home, quite frankly. But in saying that, I despise having to pee here in the States too. British loos are shaped a little different, you can actually stoop a little more forward and have SILENT PEE!

Test it out when you head to London, you'll thank me for that tidbit!

mrsb said...

Courtesy flush, please. I thought this might be a man/woman issue, so I asked my hubby and he confirms the need for courtesy flush.

We thankfully have 2 bathrooms (we've got 3 kids, it's really a necessity), so it isn't often an issue in our house ;O)

Anonymous said...

My husband agrees w/ your husband.. (navy days have taken away his manners) I agree with YOU! Matter of fact, I don't even do that in public restrooms.

Malibarnett said...

I found your blog through Kritta22. I agree with you about public restrooms. I will hold it as long as I have to so I can use the bathroom in my own home. I also like the courtesy flush and I do the same for others. Great blog subjct!

Natalie Sue said...

hahaha... that is hilarious! I for one, can never go #2 anywhere besides my own home...unless it's been more than a few days, then I can't help it.lol.. more detail than you wanted to know, I'm sure! And the courtesy flush? Doesn't everyone know that rule? The faster the flush, the less the stink!

Romi said...

I too have major stage fright when it comes to public bathrooms.

I also believe in the courtesy flush and doing your business as the loo flushes so as not to offend other parties in the bathroom too much.

I hate when I have to do that in a public restroom. I want to yell out an apology.

Thanks for dropping by my blog for Camp Candid Carrie and leaving a comment.

Anonymous said...

Yes! Thank you for spreading the word about the "Courtesy Flush" - THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW!

And on a more serious note, thank you for posting Glen Beck's testimony. I already admired him and hearing him publically relate his conversion story was just amazing.

Great blog. I'll be back again soon! Come visit me: http://www.supermomcentral.blogspot.com


Kritta22 said...

I totally agree with the courtesy flush..it's important for EVERYONE! But more importantly is the ever-other-stall rule..the courtesy flush COULD be overlooked slightly if the E-O-S rule was strongly enforced. This leaves enough room to MAYBE allow the vent system to pick up such smell and thus saving others the odor. I love the picture!!

Natalie said...

ok, so i just read this and I could jump on the courtesy flush train but I have a question: Don't you get your booty all wet when you flush while still sitting on it?! That sounds gross... If you want a new convert, someone will have to explain this to me.

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