Thursday, September 30, 2010

Why I haven't gotten my Wisdom Teeth Out.

Because of YouTube, I have decided I am never going to get my wisdom teeth out. Because my family is cruel enough that they would do this to me... just sayin.

Soooo funny. If you have time, you need to watch it! If you don't have a lot of time, watch the first couple of minutes and then skip to minute 7:25...



Monday, September 27, 2010

She wants to be like me... ut oh!

I walked into my house after a long, tiring day at work.

Walked isn't really a good term for what I was doing.

I was more... dragging myself into my home.

Anyway.

I get down stairs. And laying on my love sac is my black heels, skirt and scattered haphazardly around it was my jewelry. As I continued to stare at what was suppose to be my family room, but looked like a tornado had touched down, I smelled my Love Spell by Victoria Secret body splash.

Usually at this point, I flip. Sometimes inside my brain and sometimes, unknowingly to me, I go wild eyed crazy out loud. It's like this outer body experience and although I know I may be toeing the line of being committed into a insane asylum, I can't stop myself. I bark orders and get red in the face and turn into a HUGE, UGLY, Monstrous thing. It's not pretty.

But that day.

Well, it hit me.

My little girl wants to be like me.

This beautiful, independent, absolutely funny and persistent little girl... who is incredible just the way she is... wants to be like ME.

But I don't want her to. I don't want her to mimic me, because along with the wonderful being I am... and I understand I am worth modeling to a point, I have these flaws about me that I don't want her to ever have.

I know I can't control that.

But I panicked.

You see. She's completely and innocently confident in herself. She loves how she looks, she's funny, she cares about everyone, she hates when people are sad she is an empathetic crier, she is a great helper, she's bossy in a good I'm a leader sort of way, and best thing about her is-she could care less what people thought of her. If they don't want to be her friend or they don't like her she figures they are losing out.

And you know what?

She's right.

I sat down on my couch, absently moving princess high heels over, and became a bit overwhelmed by the idea.

So I've decided. I want to be more like her, and in return, she will end up being just herself! So I will start studying and modeling who she is.

My only problem is going to be fitting into her heels and skirts... but the jewelry should fit just fine. :)

So how did you react when you realized you child wanted to be just like you? Am I just a dorky parent or what?

Love,

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Do you have a secret? I got a solution.

I haven't done this for a while. And I need to unload some things on my mind. Some of you are new here so...

Yea... I totally made that.  I missed my calling as a graphic artist.


I thought I'd do all of you a favor and do the SECRET BOX today. Unload your secrets here anonymously or not... only if you don't do it anonymously then it isn't really a telling of a secret as much as it is a confessional.

Leave your secret in comments, get rid of it, and BE FREE!

Or not.  (But you'd be totally lame and doing yourself a disservice if you don't participate--and please tweet or facebook this up, for those who follow you, who may also need a place to dump their secrets at.  You don't win anything but that feel good feeling right *pounds fist to chest* here where it counts.)

Go ahead and follow comments because you may have an opinion on some of the secrets and so feel free to also comment on other people's comments.

Love,

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Me and the Ghost I don't believe in

I can't walk today.

I'm can't-sit-on-the-toilet-or-walk-down-the-stairs-sore.

I wish I could be all coy and fun and flirty and say I am sore for other reasons than I did lunges and squats.

But I'm not.

I did lunges with a weight over my head the other day at Satan's Lair and my legs can't seem to function since.

Want to know how else I am for SURE it's Satan's lair, besides being sore???  They post pictures like THIS picture below on their website... I'm the one in the middle... with a kettle ball between my legs and a HOLY SHIOT look on my face.  (And NO I don't dress all cute like the other two beautiful ladies to go work out... mainly because I only have my husbands work out clothes to, well, work out in.)

Now don't you all wish you could take those, "You are HOT" words back?  Well you can't!  Once you say it, that's it, I'm keeping them! So there.

On a lighter note...or scary note... depends on your beliefs, I have a ghost who plays around with my iPod touch.

I'm not joking around people.

I someone how made a ghost mad... probably because I told my husband that all the paranormal T.V. he watches, like Ghost Adventures and Ghost Hunters, is all in their heads. I may watch them with him... especially Ghost Adventures cause the guys on there rock, and they make me laugh, AND the one on there isn't bad to look at, AND the passion they have for it shouldn't be dismissed.

But it's all a bunch of crock is what I told him. And I think the ghost got mad and wanted to prove me wrong.

Here's how it plays out.

I turn my iPod to sleep. A few minutes later it turns on.

"huh?" I say to myself.

So I put it back on to sleep...

A few minutes later it turns itself back ON!

So I say, "Are you mad at me because I don't believe in you? Turn my iPod ON if you mean yes and leave my iPod alone if you mean NO."

I turn my iPod to sleep.

And... BOOM... it's ON again!

My Ghost, that I don't believe in, is apparently pissed at me that I don't believe in it.

It turns on randomly all throughout the day, and I ignore it, because that is what you are suppose to do is ignore fake ghosts bad behavior so they will quit doing that behavior. But it runs out my battery.

So I decided to power my iPod touch OFF.

And when I want to turn it on again... that darn fake ghost of mine won't allow it to TURN on!

I figured that meant it wasn't mad at me anymore... or that the power had completely died... so when I plug it in to charge it, it's not the power.

Hmmmm... weird right?

So either I have a defective iPod Touch... or a Ghost, that I don't believe in, can't decide whether it's mad at me or NOT!

Any ideas? Discuss in comments.

Love,



p.s. I'm sorry I haven't been around to your guys' blogs. I have kept up to date on reader but have been horrible at commenting. I promise I'll get around. Some stuff I've had to take care of during my blog time has been interfering... and me and my fake ghost are trying to work things out. It's been stressful to say the least ;)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Guest Contributors and Blonde Jokes! :)

Over at Real World I'm asking for Guest Contributors again. I have a bunch of topics I'd like for people to write on. Click on the pic below and see if there is anything you'd like to write on!

Venus and Mars

Now... Enjoy this commercial:



Now that is funny!

Anybody have good Blonde jokes? And since I don't like to discriminate... they can be brunette, redhead, or multicolored hair? I don't care. I need them for this talk thing I need to do.

Love,

Friday, September 10, 2010

Let's discuss. Why do you blog? And why would you keep it a secret if you did blog...in secret?

I have a serious question for you guys that I hope you are open enough to answer truthfully.

If you feel like you'd like to remain anonymous with your answer... please do that.

Why do YOU blog? Whether in secret or out in the open... WHY do YOU BLOG? And if you did do it in secret (even if you don't now I'd like your opinion on this) why do you or would you?

Here is my answer to my own question(s).

I blog because it's an out. Does that make sense? Blogging to me is much like T.V. is for other people or even reading. It's like my escape from reality. I don't get things from blogging that I'm missing from my real life. It's just an out that appeals to me. I get to use my creativity with writing as well as read and validate other people. It's also a bit like watching real live soaps or drama shows... except it's people's real lives. But I don't need it nor does it replace anything in my Real Life.

It's a bonus when I get to bond with people and then meet them in Real Life. But I'd still blog if that never happened. IN fact, for the first year and some it was just like that. Me writing and reading and receiving little if nothing back.

I think we all go through that initial... what the heck? Who are these people commenting and why in heaven's name do they keep coming back? When we first get comments that aren't our family or close friends. If we do blog in secret... I bet we never feel like anybody really is going to read it.

If I blogged in secret, I would definitely do it for a place where I wasn't monitored. Where I didn't have to be nervous about what I wrote. Where I could just write what I felt and who cares if people agreed with it or not. I would assume that would be the allure of being a secret blogger. Hiding your online life from your real world life? You could talk about whatever--whenever--and would never have to worry about hurting anyone's feelings... or anyone judging you?  Maybe?  That would be a reason I would do it.  I mean, there have been many times where I have written a post and then totally deleted it because I felt someone might take it the wrong way... some one in my Real Life.

Anyway... what are your opinions?

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

You Might Be A Redneck If...you were ME this weekend.

First of all, I'd like to thank all of you who said I was hot. I'm not going to lie... I liked hearing it.

That post (the post below this one) was suppose to be more of a coming-out-of-the-closet-I-hear-voices kinda thing. But I'll take the, "you are hot" comments also.

It's good to know that some of you hear those voices too, which makes me again, totally normal.

Labor Day or weekend, to me, means that something is going to happen that we can't see a professional to help us because they are on vacation too.

This year it was my OnLay-let me break it down for ya.

Sunday rolls around and I'm fine, well sort of fine, the fine where you have a fever inducing head cold Friday night and Saturday you are in a drug induced coma, so Sunday you feel slightly better... fine. Sitting there, chatting away, laughing, causing raucous when all of a sudden I see a bag full or red cinnamon bears.

I love cinnamon anything. Something those of you who know the day I was birthed from my mommy's belly should note.

Of course, I couldn't help myself, so I had one.

Or two.

I believe I was on number two, when OUT OF THE BLUE, I get this horrendous pain coming from the upper right side of my mouth.

My tongue goes to explore... and what does it feel? Nothing! That's right... a gaping hole where my tooth (onlay) should be!!!

If you have read me here at all for ANY decent amount of time you would know that... I'm a teeth person, (I think it stems from my parents never taking me to the dentist and my teeth starting to disintegrate so that they would HAVE to take me--some painful visits later) that once I paid for my own insurance... it was something extremely important to me.

Let's say I may have been a little dramatic... and may have freaked out a bit.

Of course, there are Emergency Dentists in town... but you have to pay some indecent amount of money for a "weekend/holiday" fee and everything up front... that your insurance will pay for later. At the time I was freaking out, it sounded fair to me!

Logical and cheap husband vetoed any of that.

So... all of that to tell you... I'm sportin a redneck tooth right now. Gaping hole with the little amount left it has just hanging there... I throw up a little in my mouth every time I look at it... or brush it... or anything. It's invisible to the human eye unless I open wide and tilt my head back... but it's there, and I KNOW it's there and that is all that truly matters.

 I went to the dentist this morning... guess I have to crown it now. I don't care, I just want it back to normal.

And NO WAY am I posting a picture of it... but if I did, it'd look something like this.

minus the hot guys and put my face there instead. Picture from HERE.
How was YOUR Labor Day Weekend? And why does something ALWAYS happen to me or my husband or kids when people aren't WORKING!?


Love, your redneck friend,


Wednesday, September 1, 2010

He totally broke his neck looking at me!

So the other day I'm walking back from my daughter's elementary school having just dropped her off. I was ready for the day because I was going to work.

So basically what I'm saying is... I didn't look like I just woke up, which can be really scary.

Anyway, a guy there totally broke his neck trying to look at me. He may or may not have been ... well, I'm not going to be rude, so nevermind.

I'm not saying that to be pompous... or vain... or "I'm all that"...

There is a point.

And the point is... what happens in my brain after something like that occurs.

Let me know if I'm alone in this thought process.

First of all my brain thinks, "hahahaha... that was so nice"

and then, "Oh yea, I still got it."

and then, "Wait... what if I just have something hanging out of my nose?"

and then, "I bet my skirt is tucked up in my under garms?"

Check nose, check under garms... I'm good.

and then, "Maybe I'm just really weird looking? Like he's never seen hair color my color... or my breasts are WAY bigger than is normal for natural breasts... or maybe he can't believe my butt fit into my skirt?"

and then, "Oh well, hahahaha, he looked funny looking at whatever he was trying to look at!? Maybe it wasn't even me!? Maybe there was someone behind me that I didn't notice? Hahahaha... people are funny sometimes."

Seriously.

Does someone else think I may have a problem with the voices in my head?

Am I the only one that follows this pattern?


How abnormal am I?

Let's discuss.

Thanks in advance.

Love,

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