Wednesday, April 29, 2009

It's time... unload Dirty Secret into my Comment Box!

It's DIRTY LITTLE SECRET time!!!


You guys.  I have a secret.  A very secretive secret!  And I can't tell ANYONE.

So I had to pull out the Dirty Little Secret Box.  



Because if any of you are like myself... and have something that you need to get off your chest... but you just CAN'T... then you can throw it in to the box as Anonymous and get it off your CHEST!

What is my definition of a Dirty Little Secret?

Something that you know, have been told, or are a part of... that you can't tell anybody else, but you WANT to... really really bad you want to... but you can't.

So... put it in my comment box... tell your secret, unload... do it as yourself, or Anonymous... but if you do it as yourself... ummmmm... I promise I won't judge, the others might because their SNOOTY like that, but I won't... and that is all that really matters!!! :)

And SHHHHHHH don't tell Pat I told you this... but I didn't recognize her until she opened her mouth REALLY wide... but I pretended to know who she was when we had lunch together!!!  Then I got to looking at my pictures and was like... OOOOHHHH... it WAS Pat the Nutty Hamster Chick! Love ya girl!



I love how T. is all shy-like-Pat's Face... and April has Pat's face DOWN to a Tee!!! :) 

Now JUMP to the Comment Box... write your Secret... and make sure to mark Anonymous, unless you don't care if everyone knows it's YOUR secret...

Love,

Shelle

76 comments:

Kritta22 said...

I'm first!!

Kritta22 said...

I love these!

I'll be back later!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Okay Shelle, just what I needed today, I'm married, but have a mad crush on another guy.

Susan said...

Oooh, I don't think I've done this yet! Hmmmm.... I think I'll have to come back later in the midst of more comments... everyone I think of will give me away even if I post anonymously!

American in Norway said...

I'm thinking...

Anonymous said...

Most of the time I feel like two completely different people... The one I portray on the outside and the one in my mind... Luckily I dont show that part of me very often. Most people wouldn't like me that way.

Anonymous said...

i seriously think i am a
nymphomaniac

really.

Anonymous said...

I told my husband I'd lose weight... All he asked was for me to cut out drinking diet coke... I told him it was a deal as long as he watches the kids while I go work out... I work out, but I also drink diet coke on my way to the gym

Mother Goose said...

LOL, ok KRITTA is not first! she left without a comment. NO fair!

Mother Goose said...

I'm first but I'll be back.

Mother Goose said...

PSYCHE!!!

Mother Goose said...

ok, here is my comment. I know this woman at work, who's husband caught her having an affair is actually having another affair with someone else! yeah, two people. NICE.
Get this, doesn't come across slutty she is a mom of two and professional, but If the name fits. Wear it.

Mother Goose said...

To your anonymous who thinks she may be a nympho! Like always always!

I say I'm a nympho because I can go through a dry spell but once I get it I want to all the time! Like morning, noon and night and maybe one quickie in the wee hours.
Yeah, gives a whole new name to Mr. Incredible, eh??
I wear everything on my sleeve or face so it would be useless for me to go anonymous.

Mother Goose said...

the whole reason why I am leaving one more comment is because I forgot to hit the email box and I definitely want to read what your man reader Southern Sage has to say about this one.

Southern Sage said...

lol
LOl
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
MG! Does your fella ever go outta town on business???????????

Didn't I comment about being the only dude here?? Sheeeeeeesh I feel like the fox in the hen house for sure now.

The only guy in a blog slap full up with sexy chicks!! AND the only guy in a blog where the sexy chick's horny buckets are running over!!!

woooooooo hoooooooo Go me Go me.
(doing the cabbage patch) (thats more funnier if you have seen me)

Shelle please please go private!! only invite the people who have commented in the last 6 posts! Lock me into this blissful place!

ok ok ok I gotta pray now.

please please please please don't let any other guys ever ever ever find this wonderful island of beautiful, smart, wonderful NYMPHOMANIACS!!!!!!

I promiseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I'll be good, and I mean it this time!! I really do I mean it.
pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
c'mon
please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Southern Sage said...

dang I forgot to comment!!! I got to excited reading comments!!!

Southern Sage said...

I cnat tpye godo wehn I gte ecxited!

ok

clam donw

T said...

Okay okay okay - I WAS the one who stepped on the squirt gun and broke it when we were all horsing around in my neighbor's basement and then lied about it later because I was worried they'd make me pay for the stupid squirt gun!

Sorry, that was all that came to mind - I'll have to come up with something a little spicier to keep Southern Sage coming 'round :)

T said...

the squirt gun incident happened when I was... nine maybe?

I'm still working on a good heart fluttering dirty secret - boy I'm boring...

Barbaloot said...

I can't even think of anything worthwhile... I didn't realize I was so boring! I'll come back later if anything springs to mind:)

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Who doesn't get mad crush's on guys? Let's be honest... You're normal!

Kritta, American Norway, and Susan... you better come back!!! You can be anonymous... but ya BETTA! I'm with Mother Goose on that one Kritta!!! YOu totally bailed!

I'm going to be honest... most people wouldn't like the things that first came to MY mind either!!!

A nymph? I bet your guy or girl is happy about that... do you keep it a secret??? lol!

Mother Goose... girl we would get a long SOOOO well. We would! I'm an open book for sure!

and Sage is a guy... so look out for what you ask for... OBVIOUSLY!!!

Sage it's okay... come back when you can type better... lol... the prayer was the best part of that WHOLE comment... oh and the cant type part!

T... hey I was at that party... no I kid, I wasn't. That is SOOOO bad... I don't know HOW you live with yourself!!! :) lol!

You guys are hilarious!

About the Diet Coke...sometimes what they don't know won't hurt them... only if he's holding up on HIS end of the bargain... hehe

Kristina P. said...

I think that SHelle is completely awesome. I hope she doesn't figure out who this is writing this. It's anonymous, right?

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I love the anonymous comment from Kristina P. and HEY need to talk to you... we should organize like a UTAH blogger get together or something? Kinda like our OWN Blog HER conference... except not that organized or put together that well... that would be TOO much for me! lol!

Anonymous said...

I secretly envy my sis' crazy sex-addict life.

Southern Sage said...

Now that ain't even nice Shelle! I see how you do me. I comment THEN you come on here cause you didn't think I'd be back to see you are gonna have a party and I ain't invited. Sure then even keep me on this side of the fence by making it for only Utites!

I see.

I just ain't feelin da luv. Sigh

Mother Goose said...

i just read Kristina P.'s blog. I don't live in Utah but I am so up for meeting up with you Ladies! I have one request! could we go to that one store, the husband and wife comfortable and clean place?? and then I would like to visit the stores that just say slutty in title. For realz.
We have been married a long time. No toys. but, neither of us have been opposed to it.
which brings me to my second dirty secret.
Because I had to go shower and get all clean again.


I may lose readers but I yam who I yam! Who says you can't have toys?? My sil's they all went to this classy night party and came home with amazing things and they love it and so do their husbands!

I want to go to a party! I would host but I tend to go overboard and have no boundaries. If I don't wear my chasity belt. I can really trash a place. NOT THAT I AM PERMISCUOUS! I just have a dirty mind that things fly out of my mouth and I really have to keep that caged. Because I can really muck a place up.
OH LORD, now I have to go pray!!! AND I believe I am officially going to take a nap. you know 'cause I'm sick!

It's all your fault shelle, dragging me out of bed just to read the comments on your blog!!!

Mother Goose said...

hey anonymous! is that my sister Jen?? I see you jen! Don't be a hater! LOL

Ok, I promise I'm gone!

Kate said...

anything I say here will and can be used against me, as most of my family reads this blog too. dang.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I wonder if I even like my kids. I mean, I love them, but sometimes I wish I could be kid-less again because they can be such BRATS! Anyone want some extras???

Anonymous said...

I just found out someone close to me is being cheated on... I don't know what to do because the person doing the cheating is even CLOSER to me.

Anonymous said...

I check this certain girls blog out... who has NICE BLUE EYES and great smokin' hot lips because she isn't only HOT... but she's funny. I think I might be forming a small crush!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

K Sage-- Of course you are invited... it wouldn't JUST be for Utah bloggers... everyone would be invited... we would just HAVE it in UTAH! :)

K--Mother Goose... you are cracking me UP right now! One of my SIL's had one of those parties... I personally have never been to one... but if you hosted one, I might snag a flight and attend... to be a good friend and support you and all! :)

Kate--LOL... they do! That's cool!

Anon--you are not alone... I think at one point in time each one of us Mom's feels that way!

Anon--It's going to get out sometime... it's hard being the one to bare bad news... but sometimes it can be helpful to get everyone to move forward in life... if you are pickin up what I'm puttin down!

Anon-- that's just cute!

Anonymous said...

Shelle,
Sunshine please tell that first Anon contributor that I had no intention of her flingin a cravin on me like she did!

Sage

Southern Sage said...

Woot woot!! I'm invited yeeeeeeeeee haaaaawwwwwwwww

Hey I have some dress up clothes too that I wear to funerals and weddings (aka, the first funeral)
It Black boots and Black dungarees!

I can wear those britches one day!

They are kinda tight cause I have gained weight since I got hitched up in em so I better get a new thong too, can't have y'all women folk seeing any lines!

Heidi Ashworth said...

I'm horrible at keeping secrets, therefore, I have none.

Southern Sage said...

Heyyyyyyyyyyy now I'm still feeling left out!!

Now I can't rightly cypher that Mamma Goose about what kinda party she's wanting to have but I didn't get an invite to that either? Why MG always gotta be hatin on a cracker for?

Why I can't be invited to the other party? I ain't sure what she was goin on about but something about "slutty" it appears. I qualify. It takes me back to the days of tube tops and daisy dukes!! And even the chicks with me wore sexy stuff too!

Mamma Goose can I come to that too??

Anonymous said...

Secret:

I recently had them folks try to figure out who I was kin to. They studied it way back yonder all the way to my great grand daddy. It was funny and we all giggled and sniggered when we got back the results. My uncle came over to read what them stupid people said, he's smart he made it to the 8th grade and passed it on only the second try.

Anyway them stupid people said I only had one great grand daddy! Ha. They also said, now get this, they are a sayin I'm my own uncle and second cousin 3 times over, well once removed.

I might be from the south but them folks are dumb!

How can I only have one great grand daddy? How could I be my own cousin?

They call that a family tree?

Guy from the south

T said...

tube tops and daisy dukes - THOSE are some days that we're hoping never happen again!

I'm just wondering which "anonymous" poster is actually Shelle - trying to share her secret without Sharing too much... does she crush on herself?

My dirtiest secret (squirt gun incident aside) is probably related to actual dirty things... like my bathroom counter... the kitchen sink...

Southern Sage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kritta22 said...

I totally got called out!!!

I figured that if I commented then Anon, Shelle would know it was either me or Crash. We are the only ones up then. While all y'alls in the 'lower 48' are sleeping, we're still rocking blogland.

You know, Crash, Swirl and I are the people that buy a Slurpee at 2am, just so the 7-11 guy can have social contact on his shift.

Cuz really, who goes in to pay anymore??

Southern Sage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kritta22 said...

If MG is spilling her guts, I'll go.

I'm totally attracted to my man but sometimes the thought of s e x, turns me off.

I would like to go back when we were dating and make out and then not stop when we had to back then.

My hubby just likes to get it done!

Anonymous said...

Shelle,

My secret is: I'm all married up with 2 young'ins and a whole bunch of chicks have crushes on me.

Thanks Sweet'ums.

Kritta22 said...

I have a crush on Sage, only cuz he blogs.

My real crush is on Quilt dad, who QUILTS and BLOGS!!!

We could really have some fun!

(OF COURSE, nothing sexual, just hanging out....maybe I need to find another word then crush....thinking......)

Kritta22 said...

I just spent $100 on a Wii Fit and used it 5 times!

Yikes!

Kritta22 said...

I sometimes go to the store and get something small and then get cash. I go buy McD's orange pop.

All so I don't have to share with my hubby!

Anonymous said...

I stayed up crying all night recently cuz my husband came home really late from watching a game with his work friends with alcohol on his breath. Even though he has an alcoholic brother whose life is ruined and has been so sad to watch! I had to accept the fact that my hubby is really inactive now and to a married-in-the-temple girl, that's so hard to take.

I'm heart-broken and so tired.

Kritta22 said...

Is T saying that she did it on her kitchen counter???

You go girl!!

Been there, done that...

Don't worry, I have and use bleach regularly!!

Kritta22 said...

Oh my heart hurts for the Anon above. I'm so sorry chica!!!!

Kritta22 said...

My dad is an alcoholic and is totally hard to watch what it did to my family.

Not for Sage's eyes:

I have a pelvic ultrasound today to figure out what's up with my whoo-whoo.

I'm secretly hoping that it is something that is big but fixable so that I know it's not my fault for not being able to have babies.

Kritta22 said...

a few more and I will go...

I used to be like a little bunny. In Tech school, we may or may have not have done it in the bathroom at Burger King.

I'm having a hard time forgetting my sister for things she has done to me. REALLY hard time!!

My sister-in-law just popped her daughters shoulder out of shocket and I am finding it hard not to judge.

WOW I sound like an old hag!!

I'm with MG, I'm off to pray!

Kritta22 said...

I signed up for follow-up comments, but they aren't going to my email. Ideas??

Southern Sage said...

Kritta:
I didn't read that part I wasn't sposed to read but I hope your tests come out good!

Southern Sage said...

Kritta:
I'm glad you have a crush on me but you have never commented on my blog!

Southern Sage said...

I re-read this one several times, ya know the other guy here that is shamelessly crushing on you Shelle.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I check this certain girls blog out... who has NICE BLUE EYES and great smokin' hot lips because she isn't only HOT... but she's funny. I think I might be forming a small crush!

If you changed the "girl" to "guy" it coulda been written about me!!!

Southern Sage said...

I read one about a bathroom counter........ was that in the Trappers' visitors clubhouse in 91?

just sayin.

Anonymous said...

I'm desperately trying to get pregnant, but I'm petrified I'll be a terrible mother and never have any fun once I have a baby.

Anonymous said...

I'm desperately trying to get pregnant, but I'm petrified I'll be a terrible mother and never have any fun once I have a baby.

Anonymous said...

Even though I'm grown and have a family of my own, I still feel like my parents don't treat me fair! Should I really still feel like that?!?! Hello.....I should be old enough to get over it.....

Anonymous said...

Shelle.. thanks for letting me vent...

Here I go....

My husband is not the father of my first child and he doesnt know it. I've known for a couple years after she landed in the hospital when she was five and I saw that her blood type didnt match mine or my husbands, only to find out that it is the same bloodtype of the guy I was dating while I was dating my husband.

brooken'dus said...

I wait until my house is so messy that my husband can't stand it and he starts to clean!! hahahaha

Melinda said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

we are trying desperately to move out of our ward. Everybody keeps telling us of properties within the ward boundaries. I really want to say "Um, we're trying to leave this shithole behind"...but I don't. I come up with some excuse I'm sure they've heard before.

Anonymous said...

All this sex talk is making me all hot and bothered....
But I'm really sad that my kid got kicked out of the house and I really miss 'em.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

OMGOSH! That is a heeelarious photo. I SO LOVE IT.

Hey, if I don't have a dirty secret can I bring my dirty laundry and unload it here?

COOOOOL. I'm going to go tell everyone. I'll pick it up later, k.

Thanks, you're the bomb.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Yea... only dirty SECRETS allowed here Crash... I don't even do my OWN dirty laundry!!! :) I don't even allow CLEAN secrets... just saying!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Oh shoots Shelle Belle, I already told everyone they could drop of their laundry. Sorry. Hope you're not mad.

I can drop by later and help you fold if you want.

Homer and Queen said...

Mamma and Sage...for h*** sakes! Get a room you two! My secrets are way to dirty to write down on this mo-mo blog, you will all judge I'm sure!!

Shelle, you rock!

Sage and Mamma, if I weren't a good girl I would be laughing my butt off right now!!!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Okay everyone... if you don't hear from me... I'm doing laundry... can people keep dropping it off... so Crash...get your TWIN BUM Over here and help fold!!!

Mother Goose said...

I am back! Dang, a girl comes down with swine fever and the she gets blamed for everything!

First things first in order.
yes, my fella does leave out of town occassionally but he leaves me well satisfied and if I always post my day or nights after. I'm just sayin.
Sage, you mean to tell me your wife has never been to one of THOSE parties?? Maybe, you do need that trip to UT. LOL, I tell you what, you host the party and I will be there.

I have to tell you I was in the same situation before. We were couple friends with 4 other couples. We all hung out all the time. Our kids got along great and we got along great. WE vacayed together too. Then one spouse of couple number 1 got together with one spouse of couple #2 when couple #2 was preggers! Can you freakin' believe??
Things were a bit odd and I and my hubz didn't like the way couple #1 was hanging and we said we were going to start cooling it with that couple.
THEN Couple #1 confides in me. She was my BFF about the affair with couple #2, I wanted to be a friend to all involved. Our bishop was notified and they were working it out with him. However, it was getting really hard for me to be friends with my BFF of couple #2, I said, I had to go to the bishop. I told the Bishop I knew about both spouses and I was BFF to #2 also, He said, don't worry, They are going to tell her in 3 days.
Well, now our entire relationship is non existent with all couples. Couple #2 BFF is mad, because she THINKS I knew and never told her. Couple #1 is mad because I did know and thought she was wrong. NICE!

To ANON- 2 out of 4 children do not have either my blood type or my dh's blood type! NONE of my four look like him. THEY ARE ALL HIS!
In fact, when our 3rd was born, her blood type is the same as our oldest. The nurse was like this is very rare. That a baby would get both your recessive. Because MR. I and I are both A+, I said, well we have another child who has this blood type too. Don't count your hubz out, just because of a blood type difference. He is hers. Unless, you know you were sleeping with both then that could be hard. But, I say don't find out unless you plan on telling your husband.

TO ANON who posted about wanting to move out of your ward boundaries! WILL YOU PLEASE COME FORWARD!! MY HUSBAND BELIEVES I TYPED THAT!! and I did not, I promise! HE SAYS I USED THE SAME WORDING TOO!! But, I feel ya on the ward thing!! totally.

I don't know what homer queen is talkin' about and for the record I am the most NON judgemental person I know. Really, just ask the lush down the road. LOL
I am sure I missed something else up there. But, I gotta hit the sack! and thankfully, I won't be alone. I'm just sayin....

Mother Goose said...

do you know that time stamp reads 10:24 but it is really 1:24 my time.
I also when I'm not sick only sleep 4 to 5 hours a day. sometimes, it's 3.

Southern Sage said...

Mamma Goosed!! To answer your question....... 1.5 drawers full!!!

cept here where we live they are all of the wind up variety! I hear some of them are out now that take them batteries and even plug in the wall! Since I can't afford to have 'lectricity run up off the paved road to the house and they skipped making the ones that run on coal oil I reckon those are out. Next time I hitch up the mule and wagon I'm gonna see if they have started selling those new fangled batteries and see what all the fuss is about!

Anonymous said...

I secretly can't stand my Bishop or his wife and there are only a handful of people in my ward that I would actually care to spend more than 5 minutes with. I love my calling but don't really care for those I serve with.

Mother Goose said...

LOL, just came back for one last looksy! SS, one and a half drawers full! WOW!
I have yet to purchase, but I know I wouldn't be getting any wind up versions. I mean you could get carpal tunnel from that alone.
Stop shopping at the dollar stores and do both of you a favor. LOL

ok, shelle if you want to delete this post! you have my humble repentant permission.

SO said...

delurking to get the follow up comments...maybe I'll come back and unload later. Not that I have much to unload.

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