Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Flashback: So I found out something about myself!

This is my Flashback post. One of the first things I wrote about. I have been wanting to participate in ScaryMommy's FlashBack Fridays, but I'm already participate in something else, so I am writing this today and then linking up on FRIDAY for Scary Mommy's thing.

The smarts come all natural over here.

Published March 06, 2008:

I learned something about myself--

I was out to lunch with some co-workers (who invited me) and we were sitting there having a great conversation.

I commented how it was funny that sometimes when you talk to someone you see that person listening to you, but you know there mind is somewhere else, (growing up around my brother, Broadway, it doesn't really faze me all that much I was use to being ignored.) So I usually finish what I'm saying anyway and then ask them a question about themselves to bring them back into the conversation. (brilliant I know...)

BUT
I also said I hate when there is a lull in the conversation...it's awkward to me...so I usually try to become the HERO and fill in the gaps, ya know, cause I'M never at a loss for words.

You know what they said after I mentioned these little quirks of mine? One girl said, "Shelle it IS hard to get a word in edge wise when you talk", and "You can carry on a whole conversation just with yourself!" the other girl flings at me with a surprised look on her face.

Oh NO THEY DIDN'T just say that??? I seriously sat there and had NOTHING to say!

I mean heck, I don't care what people say BEHIND my back because I truly believe in what I DON'T KNOW doesn't hurt me, but come on...(tell me if you silently agree, or forever shut your mouth), but wasn't that a tad bit RUDE to say to someone? When did petty girls lose their tact? :)

Luckily I am not easily offended or I might have said something I later regretted...since I tend to talk before I think

Okay, all of my "FRIENDS" (and I'm using that word lightly right now), why did nobody say anything to me about this apparent problem I have!

I am telling you the truth when I say that I have never heard this before! I really would have rather heard it from someone that knows me, then hearing it from people that I'm not quite sure really even LIKES me.

Oh well *shrugs* I'll try harder not to dominate our conversations in the future but I can't make any promises!

I wonder if they will invite me back to lunch?

***Just so you know, they did invite me back to lunch with them, MULTIPLE TIMES, and I made sure I allowed each one of them to ask ME a question so that they felt like they were involved somehow in the lunch conversation! hehe!

QUESTION: Anybody ever throw a FAULT at you to your face like that? What would you have said? Just curious!

Love



P.S. We need some IDEAS over at the REAL WORLD VENUS vs. MARS... come HELP ME!!!

20 comments:

Sorensen Family Blog said...

So I don't agree with these stupid Women! Maybe that is because I have the same traits! So when we talk to eachother we don't even notice! Anyways, love ya!

Bennett Family said...

Well, I was going to tell you the last time you were here.....but I couldn't get a word in. LOVE YA!

Southern Sage said...

how could they? I'm pretty much faultless! I have been told I am way to smart and wayyyyyyyyyy to good looking several times so I guess yeah they do throw my faults at me. Sigh, I try to dumb it down around them and try not to look so dang sexy but with what I'm working with its tough to look bad, sue me.

I would also call that talking stuff "aimless babble" I think that comes standard issue right after the installation of boobs! Guys can go to lunch, 4 of them and say only 27 words and everyone think it was a good lunch!

Marla said...

ouch! i know i'm the same way as you and i'm not sure i could take it with any sort of grace... i'd likely loose my lunch from the stress of it all...

T said...

I've always considered it my duty to "fill the silence" as well... maybe that's why blogging appeals to me, because it's just a blank page waiting for my insight?

Also why bloggers get along so well... we like to talk, but we also like to listen...

(unless of course our initials are Southern Sage and then we just like to ignore the aimless babble and stare at the chest?) Good thing he's practically perfect in every way so that we can forgive his few faults :)

Barbaloot said...

Oh my gosh---I NEED you in my life! I can't fill awkward silences to save my life. I think I get an "F" in good conversation. Heck, I get an "F" in bad conversation. And I'm totally one of those people that zones out when you're talking---mostly to boys I like. And that's not cuz I'm not interested---clearly I AM cuz I like them! It's cuz I'm busy freaking out and trying to figure out what to say next so they don't get bored and walk away and never talk to me again. Ever. But yeah-then I never remember what they've told me. It's a vicious cycle. So...um, there's your Real World topic---dedicate a column full of advice from everyone to ME one how to not be a social disaster.

Kristina P. said...

I actually think she did you a favor. Yeah, it stings at the time, but then you know and you move on.

I would so much rather people be nice and honest, than talk crap about me behind my back. Because I always find out.I'm sneaky like that.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Southern Sage--I'm glad you always find the opportunity to tell us how humble you are! lol! Poor those of us that have to go through all of this! :)

Marla--it was awkward the rest of the lunch... I'll give you that. But we are all good friends now so it turned out all good!

T.--ya know that is such a good point! It's totally true also! That includes the comment about Sage!

Barbaloot--we would be the perfect couple then. I would be the talker and outgoing, in your face half, and you would be the awesome classy and cool person everyone would actually want to be with!!! lol!

Kristina-you're totally right. She did. And I do like when people just tell me how it is so I can fix the problem!

Cameron said...

I've never had this problem, as I have no faults. But good luck with yours!!! :)

coolred38 said...

Im a listener myself so it sometimes unnerves those Im around that I dont always really take part in the convo...but tend to remember details etc (like who said what for later disagreements...lol) and so they feel like Im sitting there taking mental notes or something. Thats not what Im doing (at least not on purpose) but its how I come off. I just dont like to talk all that much in groups...they should know that by now...whatever...lol.

The Wixom Zoo said...

Ugh. My friend did that to me once and she wasn't very nice about it. I honestly don't even remember what she said, maybe I blocked it out, but I still remember how bad it stung.

The Blonde Duck said...

They probably didn't want to hurt your feelings. I always babble when I'm nervous and talk too much.

Melinda said...

I hate lulls in conversations also, so I'm like you and have to keep it going (with people I don't know that well, but if its people I'm comfortable with I can talk a LOT or just listen, it depends on what mood I'm in). I think they could've been nicer about it. It does hurt when people point out "flaws", mostly when you don't know about them. If they said "Melinda, you yell a lot." I'd be like I KNOW! But I had a friend blurt out once that I'm sort of obsessive, and it really hurt because I had never thought of it. I get ya girl! :)

Alyson (New England Living) said...

That was pretty rude, but is that just how she is? Some people are unfiltered and don't mean to offend. Is that the kind of person she is? Because if she is, I wouldn't take offense.

brooken'dus said...

haha your so funny! I don't think you talk to much at all!! I have so much fun listining to you tell all the crazy stories that you have!!

April said...

I can't stand silence either, that's why when you, me, T and NHC got together there was no silence! I don't think there is anything wrong with it! So there! nani nani boo boo! And even tho Queen wasn't at that the first lunch, she isn't at a loss for words either! Ha!

Shawn said...

I also like people to be honest with me---can't stand the pretend to like me crap....

But--that was pretty rude, fo sure!

Maybe you should talk about her faults in front of her---revenge? heh, heh...

Aubrey said...

What bee-yatches! LOL

OH! And I'm thinking of going on SITScation!!!! You looking for someone to room with?

Devri said...

that is just not nice!

Tiffany said...

Well I'd like to say that was totally rude but I can't because it's probably something that would bust through my lips at some point - I tend to just 'tell it like it is' most of the time.

I'm ALL about filling the quiet - I can't stand it when no one is talking. So I, like you, tend to fill them and lucky for me I have friends who are okay with this. I am an excellent listener too so if they want to talk I'm all for that too I just tell them to blurt it out and we go from there lol.

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