Monday, December 8, 2008

Don't Tell me what to do!

Here is one of those times I get to tell you a little more about me.

I know...TOTALLY...

Lucky you.

So after this you may either hate me or love me...but it's going to have you going one way or the other.

I'm lazy when it comes to telling me what to do.

If someone COMMANDS me to do something, or tells me how to do something, or issues me to do something, instantly I revert back to being a child and I resist.

Strong and Immovable.

Most of the time people are just trying to help, or just trying to get my help, but for some reason it is like teeth scratching on a balloon or fingernails scratching down a chalkboard to my system, and I immediately rebel.

When I was first married I decided I wanted to cook my husband spaghetti. Easy enough, for someone that almost always cooked sandwiches and cereal and dry Ramen.

I began cooking.

My husband got home and I had a bunch of pans out and had dirtied them all. I was so excited to show my husband that I was cooking for him. I knew I didn't need to rush to him to welcome him home, we had a ritual as a newly married couple and that was for him to come up behind me, find me, and kiss me senseless...aaaahhhh, the good ol' days.

After our ritual had commenced he looked at the NOW disasterous kitchen and said, "Shelle you know you can use one pan to cook spaghetti. Two at the most. You don't need every pan we own. Ya know, just for next time so it is easier on you and me...clean up won't be so much."

I went from normal, content, and ready to please newlywed to demon-screaching-ready-for-revenge-hell-bent-on-defying my husband, newlywed. The NERVE of him...he was a MAN...who was HE to tell ME how to cook?

Was it logical? Yes.

Did I care? No.

And I continued for the next year to purposely dirty more than two pans when I cooked anything to prove that I KNEW what I was doing.

When I dry some batches of laundry and let them sit in the basket, sometimes forgotten, to fold...intending to fold them, but haven't yet.

If my husband walks by them and asks me when I'm going to fold them?

I leave them that way for a few days to prove them I meant to leave them there in the first place.

Are you catching my drift people?

I don't really like to be TOLD what to do. I like people to assume I have a brain and that I KNOW what I am doing.

Even though, underneath all the craziness, I KNOW I don't know what I'm doing!

Have I totally confused you yet?

Good. Maybe that will stop your from judging me...because this is a really bad personality glitch I have...and have been working on it since birth!



Anyone else suffer from this personality plague? Does anyone have fast remedy for it? I'm sure my husband will love you FOREVER!!!


Annette Lyon said...

That sound suspiciously like me. If you find a remedy, be sure to let me know.

Brooks said...

I need a remedy too. I do the same thing and even tell my husband that if he tells me no then I'm going to do it anyway!
I can be such a baby sometimes!

Marie said...

You too?!? Crazy. And my husband was sure that it was just me who was that way.

But seriously, I am the same way, especially about obvious things. For instance after Thanksgiving dinner I was starting dishes and there was this pan with burned on scalloped potatoes, so I filled it with water and set it on the counter to soak. And as I set it on the counter (FULL OF WATER TO SOAK) my MIL says to me, "Oh, that's going to need to soak for a while." NO REALLY! I didn't say anything to her because I was already upset with her, but come one now...obviously I already knew that, right?

So, thanks for putting that out there for the rest of us.

georgie said...

LMAO...I think we are related!

Alyson (New England Living) said...

Oh yeah, that's me. Luckily, I had parents who weren't controlling, but when I married and met my MIL? Holy cow! Most controlling woman around and whenever she tries to give us advice or tell us what to do, I do the EXACT opposite. Childish? Yes, but I don't care.

Kristina P. said...

Whatever you do, DON'T read and comment on my blog today. No, I'm serious, DON'T do it!!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Hey, all seven of us are twins!

That's totally me.

In fact when I cook spagetti, my husband always tells me to stop putting the big pan on the little burner. He thinks I should put the big pan on the big burner and the little pan on the little burner. So of course I continute to cook with the big pan on the little burner and the little pan on the big burner.

Brooks said...

ps. I have been waiting for the new installment of Don't you hate it when.....there doesn't even have to be a prize, I just like playing along and have my post already to go! I actually had something happen that is too funny and wanted to share...I normally just follow along and laugh my butt off! Can't wait!

Anjeny said...

Ahahah...that is creepy to have seven, no wait, I should add myself in there to make it eight, women who are like that. And sad thing is been married over ten years, I would think that my hubby would figure out that I get really rebellious when he tells what to do and stop doing it, but no. That is why he is on a roller coaster ride. Lol.

Shannon said...

That is so me. It's bad, it's really bad. I have to hold my tongue with in-laws. I even revert to name calling. If Trent says something about me I'll usually follow with your mom.....fill in the blank with whatever he said. Glad to know it's not just me!

Nan said...

ha ha ha.... how about doing it HIS way and then never letting him forget it? That's ME! LOL If says for example, the tea is too sweet, I'll purposely make it NOT sweet enough and then every time say "Well, you always tell me I make it too sweet." when he needs to add more splenda to it! LOL ;)

Shannon said...

Glad I'm not the only one!

It grates on my nerves when Shane does this to me... like I don't know any better. So I'll call him "Dad"... as in "thanks, Dad... you know it all" He HATES when I call him that, but I think he deserves it!

Jyl @ MommyGossip said...

So wish I could help, but we are more alike than not :).

By any chance are you in UT? Several of us are getting together with our kids to do a service project this weekend. If you are here & interested, let me know and I'll send details.

Until then... I thought you'd love some fun and yummy Christmas cookies:


Jyl @ MommyGossip said...

One more thing... your photography is AMAZING!!!!

won said...

Yes, I have that syndrome also. My remedy was not likely a good one for most...I divorced him.

Now, I only have me to answer to!

wesley's mom said...

I'm so glad to see it's not just me.

I'm awful, even when I know the thing I am being advised to do is good for me sometimes I will dig my heels in and refuse.

It's a curse.

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Shelle, don't you know that you are suppose to post funny and relelvant stuff that everyone else can relate too. Just thought I would share my wisdom.
he he he didn't want to make another comment about how I hate that also. But I do.

binks said...

Ok, first - what the heck is teeth scratching on a ballon? Who does that and why?
(not that I am criticizing you or telling you what to do or anything.)

Second, obviously you are not alone. And I am pretty sure there is no known cure.

When Todd does that, I just stare at him,
*crickets* and go about my business. I swear, I was single for 30 years, I don't need no man to tell me how its done.
Even if he is right some of the time, he'll never know.
And I totally leave the laundry in the basket an extra long time too, just because he mentioned it. Extra long meaning months, of course.

Melanie J said...

Yeah, there's a cure, but it makes even less sense than the problem. My husband just tells me the opposite of what he wants and I end up doing it anyway. And I KNOW he's doing it and I still can't help it because I hate doing what I'm told. He'd tell me, "Oh, good idea using all those different pans so they flavors don't spoil each other while they cook," and then I'd make spaghetti in one pot for the rest of our lives.

Anonymous said...

OK I just have one question.... who does the dishes? In MY house, whoever cooks, does the dishes. So I want to dirty every single pot and pan, I'll be stuck cleaning them afterwards and hubby can keep his mouth shut! LOL

Tiff said...

ROFL, love this! Look how many people relate?
Today was my first day of vacation and I planned to get a few things done, but after my hubby came in to tell me I could make room for the Christmas tree, like it was my job or something, that all changed. It's 7:30 pm and I'm still in my pajamas in front of the computer. HA! that'll show him! ;o)

Untypically Jia said...

Same boat as you chica!

Once during our first year of marriage my husband offered to give me tips on why how my way of cooking macaroni or something was more of a hassle. Before he could even finish talking, I dropped the spoon and said "Then you do it!" and walked out the door.

Barbaloot said...

I realize we've discussed this whole twin thing before...but this solidifies it. It's like a knee jerk reaction to be defiant when someone tell you what to do. Lately, my knee jerk reaction is to reject any boy my parents say I should go out with. If they really liked him, they'd pretend they didn't care. How have they not learned this yet?!

Barbaloot said...

I realize we've discussed this whole twin thing before...but this solidifies it. It's like a knee jerk reaction to be defiant when someone tell you what to do. Lately, my knee jerk reaction is to reject any boy my parents say I should go out with. If they really liked him, they'd pretend they didn't care. How have they not learned this yet?!

Barbaloot said...

Oh-and I feel REALLY cool when I accidentally post the same thing twice. As if my technological ineptitude weren't obviously's more proof!!

Sher said...

Ha! This is all sounding a little TOO familiar! Thank goodness for happy pills!!

PJ - Our life said...

My sister-in-law is like that. She hates to be told when and where to be so much that she wont sign her kids up for activities because then she'll have to have a schedule!

Blogging Mama said...

Ah yes, this sounds familiar!

Susan said...

You must be my husband's direct relative. He is EXACTLY the same, and god love him, he admits it daily. So I've just learned not to "TELL" him what to do!

McEwens said...

OMG!!! That is JUST like ME!! Never tell me anything on how to do it! And if you see the laundry isnt folded, well, fold it yourself

Natalie Sue said...

Me too.. I'm like that. Once you tell me what to do and/or how to do it, I won't. So I laughed and nodded my head the whole way through your post! Love it.

Kandace said...

I suffer from the same thing.

My husband has mastered the art of how to get me to do something while making me think it was entirely my idea.

I say he just needs more training!

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Not married yet but I have a controlling room mate. And yeah, sometimes she is right, like your laundry thing, but I dont ever want her to know that.

Mindy said...

I knew we were meant to be friends :) I've always been like this!! Jason hates it too but what do you do?? I do have a simple solution but I'm afraid your husband won't love me for it........ he has to learn to live with it and not tell you what to do under any circumstance! Ok, maybe not simple, I'm still working on this in my house ;) Glad I'm not the only one! And I'm afraid it's not cureable or leaving anytime soon....or ever.

Jen B. said...

OMG! I am the exact same way! I thought I was the only one... guess not. Sure feels good to know someone else is like that!

Stodds Crew said...

so you think you have been working on this since birth?!? I prefer to think different!! LOL!!

Other things to read

Blog Archive