I'm going covert...

Okay guys you totally won't believe this but I am covert today...NO LIE!

The internet at my house is on strike. Won't let me on...

So I'm cheating on it. I have to, I don't want you to think my husband did anything wrong or get the wrong impression that we ACTUALLY did anything for our Anniversary besides go to a movie and share a popcorn. So NO, we didn't go on some extravagant trip that my husband showed up at my work and whisked me away to...(That was in my dreams and in the books I read, not REAL life, and NOBODY say different or I'll knock you to the ground, just let me live in my non-romantic REAL life and dream that everybody else lives the same)

The reality was that on THURSDAY, our ANNIVERSARY, we went to a movie and shared a popcorn.

The reason why I haven't blogged is because my INTERNET is down. Sometimes I repeat myself, get use to it.

So you guys *leans in and whispers*

I am totally at the Library writing this post! I've got Grandpa one and Grandpa two on either side of me and Sister LDS Missionaries in front of me...I'm sitting here with my Navy Blue Hoodie up over my head because I'm under the air and it's blowing COLD air...looking like I've got something to hide! It's GREAT!!!

OHMYGOSH and GADNESS how desperate right?

I'm laughing at myself right now... so completely funny.

But the cool things is, I have the time to myself anyway...and the library computers only allow me an HOUR to surf the internet...so I'm on a time limit, because if you are a dedicated MOMMY or DADDY blogger such as myself, you know that an hour in BLOG time is literally like 10.2 minutes.

So I really don't have much time. Without further ado...

DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN....

I'm sorry this is another bathroom story for me...I wanted to hold off on this, but since my internet is on strike and I have little time to post here...it's all I got right now...and I really need to know your opinion...it's been killing me to hold back, but I thought you might be getting sick of toilet stories and I was going to wait a few more weeks, but here it goes.

Don't you hate it when you walk into a COSTCO public bathroom and all the stall doors are closed, so you have to lean down, LOW, to check to see where the feet are and if they are all full. While you are leaning over, and then over some more, you spot ONE stall left with NO feet...and of course, someone walks in...then you straighten up as quick as you can and rush into the stall so you don't have to look those people in the face.

Of course the person before you didn't flush so you make a disgusted face and flush the toilet...then the toilet seat covers are gone and you have water splash from flushing on the seat...so you grab toilet paper...wipe off the toilet seat, grab some MORE toilet paper and precariously lay the toilet paper down on the seat so you feel SAFER from germs and such and then sit down to go to the bathroom...only to find out the stall door doesn't lock because it SUCKS...

Slowly the door starts to open...so you shut it and try to hold it but the TWISTER moves aren't working...so you let go of the door to hurry and pee, when some OLDER lady comes walking in and comes RIGHT to your stall and proceeds to shove the door OPEN!!!

COME ON ALREADY!!!

Older lady who doesn't do the check for feet procedure: "OOPS! Sorry...thought that was empty!"

Me: TOTALLY embarrassed and just wishing that I could be done and over with. When she proceeds to say...

Older lady who doesn't do the check for feet procedure: "You should LOCK your stall door dear!"

Me: Is she KIDDING ME!!! Who in their right mind DOESN'T TRY TO LOCK THE STALL DOOR!!! WHAT the FREAKING WHAT? Give me a break already...I held on to this pee until it was stabbing my bladder for release...she thinks I WANT TO BE SITTING THERE in a public bathroom with a won't lock stall door? Or that I just didn't lock because...because...WHO the HELK knows? Holding in my sarcastic nature, I say, "It doesn't lock".

By that time I was finished peeing. I go to wipe...guess who used all but two squares of toilet paper to clean the toilet seat before she sat down?

Yea...that would be me.

So I cleverly scraped that toilet paper off and tried to wipe the most sanitary way I could...did my pants up and got out of there!

No worries...the older lady was already in the stall so I didn't have to see her.

Yea...hate that when that happens...so tell me, what in the WORLD do you say to something like that? HONESTLY? Because if it ever happens again I don't know if I could hold my tongue like I did, because I'm pretty sure if there is a next time and I am not prepared I'll come back with some kind of sarcastic remark that is MORE in my nature, but WAY less mature!

Gotta run...

Love,

Shelle