Do you feel that YOU as a Mormon woman get treated well?

"Do you feel that YOU as a Mormon woman get treated well?" I turned around with a quizzical look to my co-worker, what the heck was he talking about now. He randomly comes over to my cubbie and asks or talks about the most RANDOM things. His questions are mostly entertaining and he is usually a nice break from the hum drum of my job.

"What do you mean 'do I get treated well? Like by my husband?'"

He said, "Yea, by your husband and male leaders of your church?"

Still confused, "Like do I get treated well how? Like not getting the calling I want?...or like are they rude, arrogant, and controlling? Yea that's my husband...but no one else." I said laughing and jokingly. He wasn't smiling.

He continued, "I have asked other women who have said that they feel controlled by the men in the Mormon religion. That men are looked at as higher up...given more."

"Wow" I said truly shocked, "I don't know who you have been talking to but that is totally NOT how I feel. I have never been more treasured as a women. We are nurtured, loved, and revered as women in our religion...especially by the leaders of our church and if you have a good man in your life and are lucky like me to marry them...then you are nurtured, loved, and revered by them."

He smiled and said something to this effect, "I had a feeling you wouldn't feel the same way. You are to outgoing and self confident to be controlled by anybody."

For those of you who don't quite understand the LDS church (Mormons), I want to give you my perspective on this myth, which it is, in my eyes anyway, because I can only speak for myself...

I thought it a silly question and one that I have never been approached about personally. You get the normal funny questions when people find out you are LDS...like, "Do you really have horns? Where do you hide your hooves? Do you give ALL your money to your prophet? Do you really believe a young boy saw Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father?" My answers are always, no, I don't have any, (although sometimes I feel they would come in handy), no, and yes.

I guess a lot of people think that "Mormon" women (women of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) are controlled, restricted, and robots when it comes to being a women member of our church. Let me just say, on this side of things and in my perspective, it couldn't be farther from the truth.

One of the things I love most about our religion is that it is guaranteed when we have our General Conferences that one if not MANY of our men leaders of our church say something to the effect of what this man, M. Russell Ballard said, "While women live in homes under many different circumstances—married, single, widowed, or divorced, some with children and some without—all are beloved of God, and He has a plan for His righteous daughters to receive the highest blessings of eternity...I surely know that there is no role in life more essential and more eternal than that of motherhood."

As in the quote from above they highly respect our ability to bear children and live in the role we seem to have been made for...motherhood...but they also respect our individual choice and right to become and do what we feel is best for us and what we discuss with our Father in Heaven...

Just to prove my point with one last quote from one of our beloved Apostles showing that we are loved and revered in our church...(What it Means to be Daughter of God--President James E. Faust,Second Counselor in the First Presidency)

We all owe a great debt of gratitude to Eve. In the Garden of Eden, she and Adam were instructed not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. However, they were also reminded, “Thou mayest choose for thyself.” 9 The choice was really between a continuation of their comfortable existence in Eden, where they would never progress, or a momentous exit into mortality with its opposites: pain, trials, and physical death in contrast to joy, growth, and the potential for eternal life. In contemplating this choice, we are told, “And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, … and a tree to be desired to make her wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and also gave unto her husband with her, and he did eat.” 10 And thus began their earthly probation and parenthood.

After the choice was made, Adam voiced this grateful expression: “Blessed be the name of God, for because of my transgression my eyes are opened, and in this life I shall have joy, and again in the flesh I shall see God.” 11

Eve made an even greater statement of visionary wisdom after leaving the Garden of Eden: “Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.” 12 If it hadn’t been for Eve, none of us would be here...As daughters of God, you cannot imagine the divine potential within each of you. Surely the secret citadel of women’s inner strength is spirituality. In this you equal and even surpass men, as you do in faith, morality, and commitment when truly converted to the gospel. You have “more trust in the Lord [and] more hope in his word.” 15 This inner spiritual sense seems to give you a certain resilience to cope with sorrow, trouble, and uncertainty.

You cannot imagine the gifts and talents each of you has. All women have appealing features. I do not refer to model-type appeal, but rather that which comes from your personality, your attitude, and your expressions. I urge you to enhance the natural, God-given, feminine gifts with which you have been so richly blessed. None of you should be so content that you cease to care about how you look or act. In his day, President Brigham Young encouraged women to get an education. This is still good counsel, but I hasten to add: in all your getting, do not lose your sweet femininity.

You sisters do not know the full extent of your influence. You sisters enrich all of humanity. All human life begins with you. Each woman brings her own separate, unique strengths to the family and the Church. Being a daughter of God means that if you seek it, you can find your true identity. You will know who you are. This will make you free—not free from restraints, but free from doubts, anxieties, or peer pressure. You will not need to worry, “Do I look all right?” “Do I sound OK?” “What do people think of me?” A conviction that you are a daughter of God gives you a feeling of comfort in your self-worth. It means that you can find strength in the balm of Christ. It will help you meet the heartaches and challenges with faith and serenity.

I wonder if you sisters can fully appreciate the innate gifts, blessings, and endowments you have simply because you are daughters of God. It is a mistake for women to think that life begins only with marriage. A woman can and must have an identity and feel useful, valued, and needed whether she is single or married. She must feel that she can do something for someone else that no one else ever born can do.

So my answer is NO I do not fell any less a woman because of my religion...if anything I feel empowered and strengthened from it.

I couldn't be more blessed as a human being...The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is not a religion I follow blindly...I have searched and questioned as any human being together with its soul will do...I know, love, and respect the truth of what I have found in this Church and am thankful for the life I have lead because of its influence and power in my life.

I hope all of you feel love and respected no matter what you choose to believe. That you have hope and feel happy with the life you live and lead.

In my rare moments of seriousness...I am glad that I can tell you of something I love and am very passionate about...

All funny and light-heartedness will continue tomorrow...carry on! :)

Love Shelle